“Living with PTSD”

We live in a very big world with billions of people in it. Having the human experience here on Earth is not an easy task. Everyone comes from different cultural backgrounds. Everyone’s experience is different. But one thing that we all have in common is everyone experiences some type of heartbreak or traumatic event sometime in their life. The severity of it will differ from person to person but we can all agree that we will have to deal with something traumatic at least once in our lives.

Living with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) can be a challenging and a complex experience that affects various aspects of a person’s life. PTSD often develops after exposure to a traumatic event, such as combat, assault, natural disasters, accidents, or other life-threatening situations. The symptoms of PTSD can be intrusive, persistent, and disruptive, impacting one’s mental, emotional, and physical well-being.

To give you my experience, I will share a little of my personal story with you.

I did not grow up with my father. My mother, may she rest in peace, tried the best she could in the absence of my father. My mother, who also had PTSD from her childhood, probably wasn’t aware of the trauma that she stored in her body. Looking back on her behavior, it was a checklist of someone suffering from PTSD. She was very absent from me when I was a little girl and into adulthood. Not absent in a physical way but absent in emotion. I was left alone for countless hours while she slept off her depression. I was also left in the care of a family member who wasn’t so nice to me, if you can read between the lines on that one.

My Mother decided to get remarried again when I was around the age of 7. The only reason she decided to get remarried was because she was codependent and could not care for herself. I remember having to take care of my mother as a little girl before she got remarried. My stepfather was very abusive to my mother and to me as well.

It wasn’t until recently that I realized how growing up in this toxic environment skewed my view on relationships. I had viewed toxic relationships as normal.

While there is a slew of other incidents that happened to me that further perpetuated my PTSD, we will stay on the topic of childhood trauma. That’s where the seed of trauma is planted and then it goes from there. It neurologically does damage to the brain. Have you ever heard the term, “what fires together, wires together”? Doctors have proven this.

People with PTSD may experience intrusive memories and flashbacks, where they feel as if they are reliving the traumatic event. These episodes can be triggered by various stimuli, making it challenging to navigate everyday life without being reminded of the trauma. People often experience heightened levels of arousal and hypervigilance, making them constantly alert and on edge. This heightened state of arousal can lead to difficulty sleeping, irritability, and an exaggerated startle response.

To cope with the distressing symptoms, individuals with PTSD may develop avoidance behaviors. This can involve avoiding places, people, or activities associated with the traumatic event. They may also numb their emotions to cope with overwhelming feelings.

PTSD can strain relationships with family, friends, and romantic relationships. The emotional distance created by avoidance behaviors or mood swings can make it challenging for individuals with PTSD to connect with others. Communication breakdowns may occur as they struggle to express their feelings and experiences.

Living with PTSD can have significant effects on both mental and physical health. Chronic stress and anxiety may contribute to other health issues, such as insomnia, headaches, and gastrointestinal problems. Coping mechanisms like substance abuse may also arise as individuals attempt to self-medicate.

Fortunately, there are effective treatments for PTSD, including therapy, medication, and support groups. Engaging in healthy coping strategies, such as mindfulness, relaxation techniques, and exercise, can also be beneficial.

While living with PTSD can be challenging, there is hope. There is recovery. Building a support network, seeking professional help, and actively participating in treatment are essential steps towards recovery.

There is growing interest in plant medicine for treating various mental health conditions, such as post-traumatic stress disorder. I am an advocate of the use of plant medicine to help alleviate the effects of PTSD and help people to recovery. For more information click here.

One major reason why I started Mona Lucia Reiki was to help people suffering from PTSD. I love doing energy work to the body to help release some of the trauma that has been stored in people’s body for years. Reiki can do wonders to the body. Even one session can make you feel lighter than when you walked in. If you are suffering from PTSD and would love to give Reiki a try, click here.


“One Day The World Will You Through My Lenses”

They say there’s two sides to a story and then there’s the truth. Often our perception of what we experience differs from what the other person experiences. Our truth of the matter isn’t always their truth. But where does the actual truth come in? Does the “truth” go by some standard? Or is it measured by our perception of the situation or matter? Is the other person lying when their perception of the matter differs from mine? 

I am going to piggy back off my last blog. I want the world to see through my lens for a moment. My truth, so to speak.  

When my whole world fell apart over a year or so ago, there were many around me who just did not see things through my perspective, my lenses. Maybe they were lying. Maybe they were the crazy ones. Maybe they were just merely looking through their lens and couldn’t possibly see what I saw or experienced. Whatever the truth of the matter is, all I can do is try to get the world to see through my lenses. Writing about my life experiences is a big form of catharsis for me. So, I’m happy to share my life with you all. 

Over a year ago, I had to make some serious life changes as I stated in my previous blog. It all started in the middle of 2022. I remember going on a trip to Mexico and when I got back nothing would ever be the same. On my trip to Mexico, I had left my child in the care of someone close. That was the first time my son had ever been away from me. I remember the day I came back; I was so happy to see my then 4-year-old son. But I knew immediately that something was not right. To spare specifics, all I will say is that I knew my son had been damaged. He started showing alarming signs and I knew that I had made the biggest mistake of my life by leaving him with someone who I thought I could trust.  


During this time, I was also trying to keep a failing marriage alive. Things just were not the same. I wasn’t getting the help I needed and when alcohol is involved, it’s never a good thing. It seemed like I had a ton of bricks on my back and the burden was heavy.  

As my son continued to show alarming signs of something not being right, I just knew something wrong in the state of Denmark as they say. At this time, I was struggling with decision making as a mother. Coming to the realization of some harsh truths, I knew I had to get my son and I out of a situation. I knew it would change my life forever.  

At the time all this was going on, I reached out to so many people, so many organizations, but it seemed like help was nowhere to be found. I started to doubt my truth and my instinct as a woman. It was as if I was the only one who could “see”. People just were not seeing my truth. But does that mean that what was happening was not the actual truth? I struggled with this.  

As I stated in my previous blog, I even reached out to my father at the time. At the time my father was in law enforcement. I thought surely, I could get some help there. That even though my father was not there for me when I was a little girl that he surely would see my truth and help his daughter, as well as his grandson.  

I was so wrong.  


I called him the day before Thanksgiving to come pick me up to give me a place to stay because I didn’t feel safe. I remember being in the living room when he and my stepmother questioned me about my life. They even ridiculed me on the fact that I had lost weight which I couldn’t help because of all the stress. I remember them waking me up on Thanksgiving telling me they had to drop me back off at home because they were upset at the fact that I still communicated with my other stepmother, who I love dearly. I just didn’t understand all the craziness happening all around me or their reasoning.  

I struggled even more. I even thought I might be experiencing some type of psychosis or craziness. I thought that maybe what I was experiencing was not real. That my perception might be off. Maybe the lenses I was wearing weren’t the right prescription.  

At the time I remember a very close friend gave me a place to stay while I tried to work out the craziness in my life. I remember crying all night and praying to God to give me some clarification. I remember holding my son’s hand as he lay next to me promising him that I would do whatever I needed to do to get him out of this.  


That morning when I woke up, I felt confidence come over me. I knew what I had experienced was my truth and I had to move on that. What I was experiencing was MY truth. And the truth of the matter is everything did happen as I experienced it. It wasn’t about my side of the story versus theirs. This was the truth. Whatever story they were telling, I definitely did not fit into it. We were in two different worlds.  


Who was telling the truth? Who was right?


Well, these are my lenses and I’m sticking to it. 


More to come  


The Courage To Be Crucified

It’s been said that the highest vibration is authenticity.  Authenticity vibrates on a higher frequency than Love. When we are fully vibrating in our authenticity is where we find our superpower, our divine purpose in life.  When I started my journey to self-discovery over a year or so ago, I was just beginning to understand this concept.  As I began to transform into a more authentic vibration it seemed like my life began to slowly fall apart.  I lost friends and even some family. I lost my peace of mind and even became physically sick. Mentally, emotionally, spiritually and physically I was at an all time low. The small group of people that had once supported me were now chastising me about my life and even gaslighting me about the life decisions I started to make.  

Writing about this makes me think of the last “Matrix” movie, “Matrix Resurrections”. When Tiffany finally remembered who she really was, is when her life took a turn. She started to realize she was actually Trinity and saw the oppressive, parasitic nature of the matrix aka the world we live in. She didn’t care that she was going to get crucified, she just wanted out of the matrix and to connect with her authentic self. She left her “Chad” of a husband in the dust and fought through all the agents that tried to “put her back in the box as I call it. This is when she fully came into her power.  


I liken my journey to self-discovery to that movie. If anyone can relate to Trinity, I guess I can. I can resonate with Tiffany aka “Trinity” as having a ‘Chad’ as a husband and feeling that void inside. As I started to make changes to my life due to coming to the realization that everything had been a lie up until this point, the more I felt I was being crucified for doing so.  Everywhere I turned for help, a door slammed in my face. As I stated above, the people who once supported me were now crucifying me. It was almost as if this was some video game, and all the agents were out to get me since I decided to exit the box.  


I can remember the night I had gotten off the phone with my dad after he told me if I didn’t do what he wanted me to that he wasn’t going to speak to me anymore. I was in the middle of a huge life change, that included my youngest son, and I needed help. I lost my mother when I was younger, and he was the only parent I had.  So, I thought that my dad would surely help.  

I was wrong.  

This was a turning point for me. I realized that I would be alone in this huge life shift. That the person that I was becoming had to leave the old life behind. Even if it was family. I had to be crucified in order to be born anew.   

There were so many other instances during this shift that I recall being crucified for because I was becoming more authentic. And it was all worth it.  

As I look back, I realize that it all happened to propel me even further into my journey of self-discovery, of becoming my authentic self. If you’ve ever listened to Dolores Cannon, she talks about “back drop” people. I now realize that these people in my life were just backdrop characters cast in my story to guide me. 

Another story that comes to mind is the crucifixion of Yeshua, and all that he had to go through. Being spit on, feeling forsaken by his father, and eventually dying on a tree to be resurrected three days later. All the pain he went through was worth it as he was resurrected better than ever.  


Over a year later, I realized that this is the hero’s journey. A process one must go through to be forged into something greater than they could ever imagine. All the pain I endured over the course of my life had led me here. In this process I had felt so weak but towards the end I realized that I had the courage to be crucified. And not many can say that, just ask Yeshua 


Mona Lucia  

He Who Holds the Devil, Hold Her Well

It’s been said that what you are on the inside is the lens in which you view the world and the people in it. I never came to really understand that, until recently. The paradigm shift that I have made in the last few years has been a monumental one, if I should say. Losing everything, and literally everything, and having to rebuild everything from the ground up has made me view the world in a different way. I had to die to my old self for something greater to be born anew. The inside lens in which I viewed the world changed dramatically.

With all that said, I want to talk about my personal journey these past few years, so people can know where I come from, and why I decided to help others. Hopefully my story can resonate with you to give you hope, and for you to know that you’re not alone. I hope to write a book one day on my life to give you the whole story; my story.

Back in 2021, I suffered from a bad back injury that I thought I would never recover from. I Spent months in bed thinking I’d never recover. Add on top of that getting sick with Covid. It was a double whammy for me. Covid had affected me in so many adverse ways. I had damage to some of my major organs, like my kidneys and liver. Cognitively speaking, it had done damage. Overall, around this time, I just felt like I was damaged beyond recovery. To add insult to injury, I was also trying to hold down a failing marriage and be the best mom I could be. I ended up having to quit my job as a restaurant manager just to keep my sanity and body together. My body would not let me work long hours anymore because of my back, and dealing with long covid.

Around this time there was so much happening within me and outside of me that was beyond my comprehension. I felt like a failure and felt so helpless. I prayed to God to give me the answers and it felt like every time I prayed things seemingly got worse.

I finally came to the gnosis that in all the times I thought my prayers weren’t being heard or answered- that in fact my prayers were being answered. I just didn’t have the insight at the time to decode what the Universe was trying to get me to understand.

I clearly remember lying in bed, one dreadful day, after crying all night and feeling sorry for myself. I remember all that morning I had been watching Dolores Canon videos. It may have been something she said or maybe it was intervention from ‘above’, but I just remember something inside of me just went ‘click’. I sat up and said to myself, “I am done feeling sorry for myself and if I don’t do something to help myself, I’m going to either die or wither away. I was in such bad shape. I was addicted to prescription meds, I had lost 20+ pounds. My body was in terrible pain. My mental state was not good, and my emotional state was disproportionate. After making that statement to myself, I wasn’t sure how or by what means I was going to get myself better; but I was determined.

I realized that the first step to healing and recovery is to first acknowledge the problems exist, and that you are responsible for correcting those problems. A lot of the time we are so accustomed to pointing blame to outside forces and people for the way our life has turned out. We all have a scotoma in our psyche that we must unveil to get to all the answers. I realized that I indeed had a blind spot about my life and that was the realization of my own faults in the happenings of my life.

I realized that I had unresolved trauma from my childhood that I was subconsciously playing out. I had a lot happen to me under the age of 5 that left unresolved deep scars. I also did not have my father present growing up, which affected me more deeply than I thought. When my mother got remarried when I was 7, it was a perpetual cycle of trauma. She married a very toxic man who abused and tormented my mother. Growing up in a toxic household was all I ever knew.

I realized that because of this, it caused me to make so many bad decisions when it came to relationships and being a mother. I thought that being in a relationship with a toxic man was simply normal. When I finally started making connections about my life, in regard to my unresolved trauma; I realized that out of ignorance I had led myself to this very low point in my life because I too, was toxic. I’m a firm believer that once you become aware of an injustice or problem it’s your job to fix it. I could no longer cover up the brokenness inside of me with prescriptions, shopping, fake relationships, positive affirmations, or anything temporary to put a band aid over it. It was my responsibility to make a huge change in my life. Not only for me but for my kids.

I decided to try out holistic ways  to heal myself. I changed my diet, studied psychology regarding trauma, dabbled in plant medicine, started studying Reiki, got into therapy, and tried making better habits for myself in every way I could. I ended up getting my Reiki 2 certification and vowed to help heal the world. As I started to heal, I could feel the density from my body leaving. My back suddenly started to heal miraculously, and the phantom physical ailments I was experiencing started to dissipate.

I’m passionate about helping people with their unresolved trauma. Trauma in the body can manifest in physical ailments and toxic, repetitive patterns concerning our relationships with people. I firmly believe that helping others heal also helps heal myself in return. We are all emanations of each other, mirrors of each other. Everything you love and hate in others, is also in you.

I never believe that evolving stops, as I am still in therapy, and will be for the rest of my life. I’m always looking to improve myself mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I want to share my journey with the world in hopes of encouraging others to do the same and to know that you’re never alone. We’re all in this together.

As far as blogging about my personal journey, I will be giving more details about my life. What I shared with you today is just the tip of the iceberg, so to speak. As I stated earlier in this blog, I am looking to write a book one day, mainly for the empowerment of Women. This past year has been a harrowing journey for me. I hope to share details of that with you as it will entail other helpful insights on how to become a better mother, love yourself, what to do about toxic relationships, holistic ways of healing. How to navigate the family court system when it comes the protection of your children, and as well as protecting yourself by studying the Constitution for the United States.

As the title of this blog says, He Who Holds the Devil, Hold Her Well. Apparently, they didn’t do a good job because here I am, an unstoppable force.





Introducing myself

Hello, my name is Mona Lucia and I am a reiki practitioner 

Hello, my name is Mona Lucia and welcome to my site. It’s a pleasure to be able to join the collective and to offer my services to people who are on the journey of self-discovery. People who are dedicated to shifting their current paradigm into a more beautiful one. Since I am multi-dimensional, I hope to offer more than just my services to you. I also want to be able to share my World, my thoughts, my creations and visions for the future with you all.  I love music, journaling, singing, creating art and helping others are their journey. I hope to create a more beautiful World by sharing these things about myself and my life by blogging to connect with others. Hopefully my story helps others feel like they’re not alone in this vast Universe. I am going through my own journey, and I welcome you to follow along. More to come ……,